It’s late October, and Hallmark’s Christmas movies have commenced. Can I watch them all? I’m going to try. Strap in for all the hot cocoa-infused meet-cutes you can handle. Next up: Boyfriends of Christmas Past.
PLOT: Lauren is a commitment-shy workaholic who’s dumped multiple boyfriends over the years, and can’t see that her hot social worker BFF is head over heels for her. (Blame the disappearing act her mom did during Christmastime years ago.) Enter the ghosts of boyfriends past, who try to get Lauren to address the trauma of her mom abandoning the family in the most Hallmark of ways.
WHAT’S GOOD
- This was entertaining, and more than just “frantic city girl realizes the true meaning of Christmas.” And who doesn’t love a good Christmas Carol-inspired flashback? (Bangs are never a good idea.)
- For anyone who watched Ginny & Georgia or Maid on Netflix, it was good to see Raymond Ablack finally play a character that gets the girl, though he did have to do the lovelorn puppy-dog-eyes routine for most of the movie.
- Lauren: “I just forgot.” Nate: “That’s even worse.” Concise, effective dialogue.
WHAT GETS THE SIDE-EYE
- Did Nate grow up without a family, and would he happily be accepted into Lauren’s? Yes! Thank you, unrealistic dining room table exposition.
- All of Lauren’s ex-boyfriends were attractive, considerate, and ready for lifelong commitment? In this economy? (Okay, except maybe Tyler, but she did him dirty at that school dance). But nary a frat boy who would dare text “sup?” at 3am. Stuff of dreams.
- Uh, poor Lily, I guess? Is Lauren just Julia Roberts from My Best Friend’s Wedding? Hallmark should at least consider a spin-off movie for Lily, who retreats to her Christmas-loving hometown after being dumped by the handsome social worker, where she yada yada yada, gets engaged!
FINAL SCORE: 8/10. No big-city slander or Christmas tree farms. Fine holiday fun.
IF THIS WERE ON HBO: It’s already a gender-flipped Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, so basically: more sex and Matthew McConaughey.
Previously:
